just some poem i wrote in the middle of work

if you're reading this, you should know by now that i've been obsessed with sally rooney's hit novel normal people (also adapted into a limited series in hulu). i wrote this poem assuming the point of views of marianne and/or connell's. in my head, there's a certain melody/tune that comes with it, but i'm not taylor swift who could expertly write notes. just enjoy the pain, i guess lol.

stolen glances, longing stares

from across the room

i could feel their weight

drowning me in curious awe

do those brown eyes hold

the promise of love

or do they only see

through the haze of lust

i'm confused, baffled

for in a lifetime of loneliness

i have never seen the shades of love

nor have i ever felt its edges

those ragged fridges scar me

with the thought of you

being in love with someone else

i am entranced, hopeless

close to the precipice of tears

for how could something as love

anguish me with its beautiful rawness

and hurt in the shadows of my insecurity

i wish i could keep you

more than just my little secret

more than just a loveless affair

more than just a whisper of promise

and so i return your stare

from across the room

eyes shrouded, hiding the truth

scared of losing what little we have

taking to heart the most that we can have